“Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward together in the same direction.” – Antoine de Saint Exupéry
If you read our little bio on the main page, you have a little understanding of our story.
We’ve been married since early 2005 and have 2 daughters, Hooley and Natalie. What we’ve found through this journey of near-divorce and resurrection of our relationship is that the challenges we faced as a couple were pretty similar to so many of the couples we talked to, notably our friends.
We noticed that our marriage wasn’t always terrible. But we found ourselves in this unending cycle of fixing what was broken. It was always 2 steps forward and 2 steps back and we weren’t satisfied with our relationship.
Our marriage lacked a vision and clear direction. We didn’t have any sort of plan. If our relationship was a priority (like our business/career or our health), what were we actually doing to grow it and improve it? What were we doing to help it thrive? What commitments were we taking action on and sticking to?
When we created that vision together, we then had to make a plan on how we would achieve it. We created tools and habits. We constantly checked in with each other to make sure we were on track and made changes along the way.
We become friends again and fell back in love with each other.
The couples we were close to took notice. They were curious. They opened up to us and asked us to share with them what we did.
So Legendary Couples with Kids was born. It’s our space to share with you the Philosophy we developed as the result of work we did to create the relationship we wanted. What’s so wonderful about this is that we feel our marriage and the direction we’ve established for our family is constantly evolving and moving forward. We never feel stagnate or stuck.
The results of taking our own courses even sparked our behavior and encouraged us to line up with our values for our family in an even more radical way. We sold our home, bought a small 70 year old farmhouse about an hour a way, began homeschooling our daughters, and started a family project together called Artemis Farms. Now, not only do our daughters get to witness REAL, CONNECTED LOVE in their parents, they get to be a part of helping move our family in a direction we all have ownership in.
When we face challenges today, we now know how to resolve the conflict very quickly; truly listening to and understanding each other. We know what ignites JOY in the other. We’ve cultivated a safe space for vulnerability.
Not every couple or family should take the same actions we did, but we wholeheartedly believe that every relationship needs a vision, it needs a plan, and commitments and habits on how the two of you will get there.